RESPONSIBILITY-the key factor for any Muslim Man who wants to marry more than 1 wife!Who said?My Ustaz..just now at the Masjid..

Yes,the main factor for any Muslim Man who want to marry more than 1 wife is to be RESPONSIBLE to his loved ones ie.his 1st wife,2nd wife or to his 3rd and 4th wives plus all his children from all the wives concerned!Can YOU be that Responsible Muslim Man?

In Islam as my Ustaz Hj.Taufiq Musaddad stated tonight at my Masjid Maghrib Lecture series,we need to focus on 3 main basic areas of Islam that are:

1.Aqidah

2.Syariah

3.Tasauf

Our IMAN is not good if we do not have all these 3 attributes in ourself.

Allah SWT (God Almighty) have promised mankind that “Allah SWT is always with people who are SABAR (have great patience) in their lives.

Allah SWT actually wants us to always seek help or assistance from HIM so thats why many Ulamaks are always worried or “uneasy” if they are not continually being challenged for their patience by Allah SWT.Why thats so?

Based on my Ustaz’s lecture tonight,he said we always think highly of our children who graduated from the many top notch universities of the world like Oxford or Harvard but think lowly of our children who did not go to College or Universities and only stayed at home to do all the house work or assist the parents in their day to day errands or work.Why?

If one were to review or assess back their lives involving their children,one will realized that those children that graduated from all the best Universities in the world are actually the one that tend to forget or ignore their parents more than those that had stayed at home and did not go to the Us’!These children with their new highly paid profession and staying away from the parents will tend to visit their parents less (due to the busy professional and family life schedules) plus the feeling of no urgency to visit their parents since they have been attuned to life away from their mama and papa for so long and they feel the comfort of being on their own with their wife and kids.Why is that so?

This is the result of not appreciating the love of their parents who have raised them like “hell” through all the challenges of life and even sacrificing their health for the sake of the children’s good future.However the kids that we think are “useless” who stayed at home and not go to the Universities are actually the one who really gave their love and time for their parents and ensure that their aging parents are continually looked after with the best of love and caring.These children are always “sabar” or have great patience in managing their age old parents while their siblings are all away with their new found living and luxury!

So,its good for all of us who are classified as “professionals” to think back as our roles and responsibilities as children of our parents and how’s best to give back our love,commitment and sacrifice for the benefits of our aging parents!We also need to guide and teach our wife/wives or husband and also our children about showing the same great respect,love,caring and commitment to ensure our aging parents are given the best that we can provide them.Actually,our parents do not want all the wealth or monetary benefits from us BUT what they really want is our sincere,continual and care for them all the time especially when we are so busy with work and all the responsibilities of our lives..

My Ustaz also said that if we are sabar,we will be granted with blessings (darjat) 300 times more from Allah SWT.If we abstained from all the things that Allah SWT forbids we will be granted with 600 times darjat.If we able to fight against our desires (hawa nafsu) then Allah SWT will reward us with 1000 times of darjat!

Prophet Sulaiman as once stated that “it is more difficult to fight against our desires than to build a city!”

My Ustaz also stated that (in Malay) “sebaik2 pemuda ialah yang merupai orang tua dan sejahat2 orang tua ialah yang perangai macam orang muda”

In English translation,it means “the best of the youth are those that appear/act  like old people and the worst of the old people are whose behaviours are like the youth”

In summary it is important for all Muslims to understand not only the aqidah and syariah but also the tasauf aspects since it reflects our true internal self and reflects a lot on our iman!

You can read the many books (kitab) from Imam Al-Ghazzalli since this Great Islamic Scholar is one of the key Gurus of Tasauf after the Holy Prophet pbuh,Pious Caliphs and all the Sahabats.

RESPONSIBILITY is the great factor as what we can learn from the above explanation and if you want to have more than 1 wife than BE RESPONSIBLE all the time.Can YOU?

How much do you really love your wife or wives and also your children-Read on….

Ramli have just read this interesting article at thestar.com.my and its about the Muslim women rights to claim her fair share of her husband’s wealth as a result of his sudden demise or divorced.Like some of my uncles,they have been very far sighted and practical where they make sure all their children have a house in their names and this arrangement is made known to all family members concerned while their father is still alive and healthy but how many Muslim fathers act in this way and all wealth distribution are made when they are no more around and in Islam all wealth distribution are based on the Faraid System.In this article the writer explained about how a Muslim wife or wives can claim their rights to the husband’s wealth based on “harta pencaraian” clause or joint assets accrued during the marriage clause.This is worthwhile to pursue since the surviving wife or wives also need money to sustain her livelihood and her children and not have to live in misery what more loneliness and no man to look after her unless she remarry or forced to remarry to sustain her livelihood and her children.

Hopefully all men including Ramli realized the importance of our husband’s responsibilities not just when we are alive and strong but also when we are gone and how our wife or wives and children can survive and live happily always without our presence and comfort.

Please read this article below:

Sunday April 4, 2010

A wife’s rights to hubby’s assets

By SHAHANAAZ HABIB

newsdesk@thestar.com.my

KUALA LUMPUR: Very few Muslim women know that they are entitled to claim harta sepen­carian which can amount to half of their husband’s assets upon the latter’s death.

It is common for women to stake a claim for harta sepencarian (joint assets accrued during the marriage) in divorce but not in death, said AmanahRaya Legacy Services CEO Rafie Omar.

“This is because Muslim widows do not know their rights and entitlement. They think that if they have children, they are entitled only to one-eighth of the husband’s assets (under the faraid system) and if they have no children, they think they can get only a quarter of the husband’s assets.

“But women in Malaysia contribute to the success of their husbands, so the women should claim and are entitled to a portion of the harta sepencarian if they can show they contributed,” said Rafie in an interview.

He said this was on top of the faraid (Islamic inheritance law and distribution of estate) portion the wife would get.

Hence the difference between Case 1 and Case 2. In the first case, Zainab knew that as a wife, she could claim up to 50% of her spouse’s assets under harta sepencarian. So she received RM500,000 from her share of harta sepencarian and another RM62,500 as her faraid share (which is one-eighth of the remaining RM500,000).

Kamariah, on the other hand, was not aware of harta sepencarian and made no claim for it. As a result she received only RM125,000 which is one-eighth of RM1mil.

(In both cases, the rest of the money and assets were divided among the children with the boys getting twice the share of their sisters).

Under the faraid system, a wife with children would get one-eighth of her husband’s assets and she is entitled to a quarter of her husband’s assets if they have no children.

“If I die leaving RM100,000 in assets and my widow can show that she contributed to the sum, she is entitled to half of it and will get RM 50,000 first. Then from the remaining RM50,000, she will get her one-quarter share (if the couple has no kids) or one-eighth (with kids),” he said.

Rafie said even if the woman was a housewife who stayed home and looked after the kids, she could still claim for harta sepencarian.

“She can say that having a good wife at home made his life comfortable and easy for him to earn a living. If she can prove this in court, depending on the judge and evidence given, she is likely to be apportioned 30% to 50% of the harta sepencarian,” he added.

When such a claim is pending in court, Amanahraya (Malaysia’s premier trustee company) would suspend the faraid distribution until the matter is settled“We will pay the harta sepencarian entitlement first. And then distribute the balance under the faraid,” said Rafie.

Under the faraid system, if a wife has no children and no male relative, she gets a quarter of her husband’s assets and the remaining three quarters go to Baitul Mal (the treasury under the states’ Islamic councils), which is why it is important for her to claim the assets under harta sepencarian.

If the wife can prove to Baitul Mal that she was the one who paid for everything, it may even renounce its right to the assets.

On polygamous marriages, the wives should also know their rights to the harta sepencarian.

Citing an example, Rafie said that Mr A married Madam B for 20 years and acquired RM10,000 during their marriage. Then took a second wife, a Madam C, who is the daughter of a rich man. His business thrived because of her contacts and he subsequently acquired RM10mil. Later, he married Madam D and did not acquire much during his marriage with the third woman.

Would all his three wives be entitled to equal share after his death?

“If he leaves behind RM10mil upon death, it is not fair to his second wife if the wife’s portion of one-eighth under faraid is to be divided equally among the three wives (with each getting a 1/24 share). Because it was during his second marriage that he made his money. “So, his second wife should claim under the harta sepencarian that it was during his marriage to her that he became richer. She has to prove that it was the second marriage that made him richer and not the first or third. If she does that, she can walk away with up to 50% of his assets,” said Rafie.

Case 1: Zai­nab’s husband Ismail dies and leaves behind assets comprising savings, EPF and a link house worth a total of about RM1mil. They have two boys and two girls. She receives RM562,500 as her share from the assets.

Case 2: Kamariah is married to Sabri who leaves behind assets worth about RM1mil when he dies. However, she is apportioned only RM125,000. She too has two boys and two girls.